Hey, Jay Leno! Listen up!

(Credit: Getty/ NBC)

In just a few short days, the tube will never be the same again. After several years of struggling to find a stable of successful scripted programs, NBC is giving up on the 10 p.m. hour. Its sacrificial lamb? Jay Leno.

The oddness of the network's decision to rehire the ousted "Tonight Show" host for a new nightly program at a time once reserved for ratings powerhouses like "E.R." is still setting in, but as of September 14, "The Jay Leno Show" will be broadcast every night, Monday through Friday, from now until the end of time—or possibly just November. Details on the talk show are still under wraps, but we have it on good authority that it's not going to look that different from his last gig.

So while there's still time to put in a few requests, we're taking a look back at the best and worst bits of Jay’s "Tonight Show" years—and offering a plea that the worst gets left behind.

Keep: "Headlines"
Probably Jay's most consistent “Tonight Show” segment—airing every Monday night for lord knows how many years—was also most definitely his best. "Headlines" devoted a good five minutes of each week to the amazing typos, mistakes, and lapses in judgment found in local papers around the country. And while the slow (er, rapid) death of print means there'll be fewer gems for him to mine on his new show, they will most definitely still be out there. 

Kill: Ross the Intern 
We've seen his appearances on "Celebrity Fit Club," "Chelsea Lately" and "The Insider," and his social commentary just isn't up to snuff. It's too late for us to not blame Jay for the creation of this pseudo-celebrity by having Ross pose as an "intern" on "Tonight Show" skits, but he can stop contributing to the madness. Leave the fake low-level jobs to folks better suited, like Kenneth the page. 

Keep: Animals!
Please, please tell us that just because Steve Irwin is still dead, and the show is now on at 10 p.m., that there'll still be room for animal guests. They're usually so much more entertaining than celebrity guests, and nothing makes lemur poop "pop" quite like a blue blazer and salt-and-pepper hair. 

Kill: The Look
Remember when all of the late night hosts came back after the 07/08 writers' strike with beards? Oh, that's right, Leno didn't. He never, ever changes. There must be a skunk-haired version of Dorian Gray hiding in a locked room of the Leno estate, because Jay's been sporting the same 'do and duds since 1992. We're not demanding an extreme makeover, but a bit of an update would be nice.

To prove our point, we've got this video from Leno's first year in the "Tonight Show" seat, back in 1992, when he interviewed Tom Cruise. See what we mean?

Keep: "Dealing with the Public"
Were you aware that states across the country are currently considering legislation that would ban the release of 911 calls to the media? That means we won't hear real-time outrage from Popeyes customers, stoned cops thinking they smoked themselves to death or people accusing their neighbors of breaking into their own homes. Leno certainly doesn't have the corner on this brand of exploitation, but as a recurring segment, "Dealing with the Public" was always a nice slice of life.

Kill: Howie Mandel
Jay Leno and pretty much everyone on the NBC payroll suffers from a deep infatuation with Howie Mandel. His recurring skits on "The Tonight Show" had all but ended after the success of "Deal or No Deal" but we'd like to go on record against a potential resurgence just in case. We'll always prefer Mandel as the voice of Gizmo in "Gremlins" (that is, off camera).

Keep: "Stuff We Found on Ebay"
Against all odds, eBay is still a goldmine of absurd crap. There's even an "Incredibly rare peanut that looks like Jay Leno in profile" going on the site for $60 as we type. And we're a little upset that Jay's not back yet to address this miracle of nature on one of his better recurring skits.

Kill: "JayWalking"
We get it: people are stupid. After keeping the gag going on for so many years, the buffoonery of the public interviewed in Jay's recurring man-on-the-street segment almost always feels staged. And when it doesn't, it’s just depressing. 

Keep: Kevin Eubanks
Every late night talk show host demands a comedic wingman, often in the form of a bandleader or musician. The problem is they're often way too spotlight starved or awkward to really fit the part. A cross between Max Weinberg and Chuy Bravo, “Tonight Show” guitarist Kevin Eubanks played the straight man to perfection, only rarely cracking a smile for Leno's jokes. His skepticism is something we'll sorely miss if he's not back for the new show. 

Kill: Playing it Safe
Joan Rivers recently put it best: "When was the last time you heard, 'Did you hear what Leno said last night?'" Well, never. And not just because you have to be an octogenarian or a 12-year-old boy to get his humor. Leno never says anything scandalous. He doesn't sing songs about screwing young actors or insult backwoods former governors. You're old, rich and inexplicably popular, Jay. Now's the time to push the envelope!